As someone with a gambling addiction I have told my fair share of lies.
When my girlfriend would ask what I was doing when on my laptop would I tell her I was gambling? Nope I’d lie, I say looking for new jeans or whatever I could quickly think of.
And of course the lies I’d tell based around money.
I had to learn to be honest with myself
I would tell myself all kinds of things to justify betting.
Things out of my control mainly and a lot things that weren’t true.
I’ll win it all back and pay off the debt
I’m in control
Just one more blackjack hand and then I’ll go to bed
This horse can’t lose
I’ll get the bonus soon on this online slot
I’ll only play with £50 then i’ll walk away
I got caught into a trap of repeatedly telling myself lies that would make gambling ok in my own head.
I’d got to the point where I couldn’t get my hands on any more money, I was due to be paid in the following week which would go straight into my unplanned overdraft.
I had to face the music.
I sat down worked out how much debt I’d racked up and how long it would take to pay it back.
I couldn’t feed myself the lie that I can bet my way out of it because I didn’t have access to any more money.
I didn’t have much choice other than to be brutally honest with myself about my situation
In the space of 1 month I’d come clean to my family about my gambling addiction and financial mess, I’d handed over control of my finances to my girlfriend and had a counselling session setup with Aquarius.
I quickly learned that it was the best way forward and this resulted in me taking the actions above.
You’ve got to want to change.
Someone on the Gamcare forum bought this one to my attention and said it should have been the 6th thing on the blog post 5 Things you should know when facing gambling addiction
It’s brutal truth we need to realise when facing gambling addiction, I don’t think it’ll work if you don’t.
I didn’t want to change when I first came clean to my family but having the most difficult conversation with them and seeing the disappointment and a bit of anger in their faces was enough for me to want that change.
All the actions I’ve taken since that conversation and to know wouldn’t have worked if I didn’t find that want to fight this addiction.
The further along I get on this journey the more I want to change.
I want to create a better future for myself and girlfriend.
I want to regain the trust of my family
I want to pay off the debt I’ve racked up to through this addiction
I want to truthful with loved ones and not have to lie about gambling
Just because you don’t start out with that want to change you can certainly find it.
Be Honest with others.
I’ve mentioned how important having people to talk to is in a previous post link below.
I had accountability partners in my girlfriend, mom, dad and my friend.
I’m painfully honest especially with my partner.
Thoughts, dreams and urges of gambling I would tell my girlfriend how I’m feeling.
Times when there’s lack of money I express my concerns with her.
The point being is I share what’s going on in my head With my girlfriend.
It helped build trust in our relationship again after blocking her out whilst I was gambling heavily.
If you’re attending counselling or GA meetings you should definitely be 100% honest in your sessions.
I managed to not gamble for a year before my major relapse and hitting my bottom.
During that year I was attending counselling sessions with Aquarius.
I only attended 4 or 5 because I didn’t think it was helping me.
But I wasn’t being 100% truthful in my sessions because I was embarrassed.
Now I’ve learned I need to be truthful if I was going to get control of my addiction.
Second time around with the Aquarius sessions I made sure I was honest.
I realised that you get out what you put into these types of sessions.
Understanding that hiding or lying about parts of my addiction just kept them hidden in these sessions and if I was to get better with the help of Aquarius I had to be truthful.
Has being honest helped you in anyway with your gambling addiction?Tell us your tips and story in the comments below and we can get a discussion started.
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